Is it rude of me to not accept my dads money to buy a car that I want?

I recently graduated Nursing school (he pushed me to be a Nurse). I feel like my whole life I have been told what to do by my parents. Never really had a say. I will be 22 this year and I recently graduated and got a full time position at my placement. I start February 1st.

My dad was so happy and proud of me and he said he wanted to reward me by putting a huge down payment on my car. He said "lets go to Honda and I will put $4000 down". He never asked me what car I wanted. Its only because he is paying for some of it he gets a say.

I don't want a Honda I want a Chevy. He got upset and he said that he won't put any money down if its a Chevy. But I never once asked him to put money down on my first car. I have enough money for finance it and I have good approve credit from the bank. I told him "That is fine but I don't need your money I can get it myself".

My whole life has been like this. He made me go to Nursing school because he will be paying for it (I had no money saved up my self because I was in high school).

Then last year I had plans of moving out and he never supported it and wanted me to live with them until I get married.

One day I think I might just move out and I won't tell anyone. Just move to a place and cut connections with everyone because I don't want to live in anyones shadow or know that the only reason why I have this is because of them etc. He even said he will put money down on a Condo for me in this area, but I wanted it in a different area.

Added (1). at the end of the day with the car he is buying something that he wants for me not what I want for myself…

It's your car and you are the one paying for most of it, you need to be happy with your choice. It was appropriate to turn him down. As you work on gaining your independence, start keeping your plans private and don't tell your family until the last minute. Your already know that your father only wants to support your choices on his own terms, you are going to have to set boundaries and leave him out of the process. In the end, he will respect you more for it.

No, not rude. I'd explain to him you are 22 YO, and an adult. Thank him for all he's done for you in the past but it's time to spread your wings. YOU are going to buy the Chevy and soon intend to move into a place of your own. Sure he'll rant and rave but you have to impress upon him your plans now that you are fully employed and want to move on to another phase of life. Stand fast and good luck.

Yes, you're an adult and you have a job. You should live where you want and buy what you want.
But you're wrong about the car- you'll by pouring money into the maintenance of a Chevy. Buy the Honda.

Everyone has given you excellent advice but I want to give you another option. I would let your dad put four thousand dollars down on a Honda. Then use your savings to move out of your parent's home. Keep your Honda for a while and if you don't like it, trade it in for a Chevy.

There's nothing wrong with a 22 year old who wants to grow up and be on their own. It is not required that you disappear out of the lives of your loving, kind and generous parents in order to stand on your own two feet and be your own boss. You do not need permission to get a place of your own. It would likely be a good idea to work at your new job long enough to meet a couple other nurses and maybe get a place together so you have a roommate or two while adapting to being on your own. That's a good first step at your age.

I hope you like the idea of nursing? Considering you say your father forced you to go to school for that. I find it odd but a lot of parents pull thisShit.

And it's up to you whether you take the Honda or you get your own car. I just wanted to let you know what my mechanic said about Hondas -- he told me if i got a Honda, he'd probably never see me again, except for oil changes. I guess they are the most reliable cars right now.

I think its rude, cause he did it cause he wanted to and not cause he had to

I've been on my own since I was 17 years old and I would've loved to have support from my parents! Monetary support or any other kind ever came. I now have a 19 year old daughter and while I do give her any support needed, I try to keep in mind that she wants to learn how to do things by herself. Unfortunately she'll find out some things the hard way & will learn she should've listened to me on some things! That's how it'll b for you also. Don't be a fool & just smack dad's hand down on everything! Humble yourself & acknowledge that he knows things that'll take u 20 more years to learn!

You're a dummy, if you don't take your dad up on his offer to put $4000 down on a Honda. You'll be saving $4000 of your own money, if he does.